hmm.. it's been.. days? since i last blogged? due to request n boredom, aight.. i'll blog then.. many things had happened over the past few days.. no no.. i'm not saying that they're bad.. =) i just have no comment for it.. now let's see.. what have i, the monkey, *laughs*, had been up to.. x) yes yes.. most of u will regard me as 'banana' or 'iguana' or 'ibanna' or 'banna' or whatever nick that there is that u peeps out there would love to give me.. =) well.. here goes..
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Monday, 16th April 2007
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came down to mum's office in the morning as usual.. well, bored.. hehe.. came online a while to check up on my blog and friendster.. took a short nap after that.. yep.. on the couch.. hehe.. it's cozy for me okay?? =P well.. woke up at 10? went to wash up.. just to wake myself up.. was really sleepy.. as usual.. =) hmm.. walked over to the "place" with mum.. did my interview then.. the lady didn't ask me much.. according to her, "since there's no much to ask u as u're available most of the time, i'll call u asap n let u know alright?" well.. aight then.. called my mum.. she waited for me on the other side of the road n i crossed over.. I DON'T CROSS THE ROAD BLINDLY IN FRONT OF MY MUM OKAY?? i'm good.. haha! =P hmm.. in the afternoon.. nothing much.. just lazed around as usual.. *ivanna dalam kebosanan* haha! suddenly i'm in bm mode.. i must be mad.. haha! =P hmm.. nothing much then on monday.. anticipated for the call from the "place" then.. due open on wednesday.. hmm.. =) i had migraine again then.. so i went to rest up really early.. didn't take any meds.. told my mum that it'll go off soon.. so i just lay there.. on my bed.. lying in opposite direction.. was charging my phone at the end of the bed.. listened to my mp3.. and finally it went off.. =) so i just stayed up a while till around 11.. then went off to sleep.. *sweet dreams*
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' mr sandman.. give me a dream.. '
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Tuesday, 17th April 2007
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Dear Diary.. I saw this guy today.. He was gorgeous.. Definitely eye-catching.. It was love at first sight for me.. I couldn't take my eyes of him.. After he left.. My mind glued to him.. Everywhere I go.. He seems to be there.. He's so beautiful.. I wanted to hold him.. Tell him how I feel about him.. Let him know that I'm here.. Let him see my existance.. I hope to see him again, diary..
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hahaha! i betcha guys wondering what that was all about? i was pulling ur legs.. x) haha! i don't own a diary, and i'm not so desperate.. *coughs* please.. hehe.. hmm.. tuesday.. i had migraine again.. sigh.. went out in the afternoon.. hey i'm a good fashion consultant for guys alright? =P hahaha! *thick face* hmm.. well.. nothing much to do.. got myself a new bracelet.. it's made of shells.. will post it up soon.. hehe.. came home.. had migraine again.. was real bad this time.. so i slept early.. mum tucked me in early after rubbing in some 'tigerbalm' on my forehead.. =) thanks mummy.. slept till the morning..
*dizzy*
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Wednesday, 18th April 2007
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the "place" didn't call me at all.. =( sigh.. came down to mum's office.. played some games.. did the usual things that i do online.. hmm.. =) well, unfortunately, migraine struck me again.. i know i know.. it's "weird" i keep getting them migraines.. hmm.. took a nap then.. woke up.. all dizzy dozzy dazzy.. haha honestly, i have nothing much to post about.. i'll only have things to blog about when i'm out with with friends or so or something or well.. hmm.. ahha! =) yesss i miss them.. i miss my friends a lot.. and the fact that i only have less than 3 months here with them, sigh.. =( went home for lunch..
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dad: r u sure that u want to take up the course there? is it really what u want? cos ur mum said the other time that u want to do music..
mum: what me?? don't always simply use my name la!
dad: *ignores* that time u took the music form home i didn't say cannot.. ur mum said i said no need that's why u didn't go for it..
me: *silence*
dad: are u sure u really want to do this? don't waste my money.. don't fool around.. i'm not looking down on u or anything..
me: *thinks ''sure u aren't", roll eyes*
dad: the money is there.. u can go study.. but r u really going to do it properly?
me: *retires into my room*
dad: see! when i sit down to talk to u and discuss things with u and u just walk away like that.. go into ur room.. i'm trying to discuss things with u here.. u don wan to take up other courses.. i just want to know if u're going to work hard for this course.. not saying that u're not good enough and i'm looking down on u..
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sigh.. his words impaled me real bad.. but i stayed calm.. i still talk to him.. i was still being nice to him.. he's my dad after all.. and i still love him.. =) well.. didn't do much in the afternoon either.. the office boy came to tell mum n i that the "place" opens on the 20th.. hmm.. i think i'll sign off for wednesday.. haha! x)
*sleep tight*
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Thursday, 19th April 2007
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ahh.. still waited for the call from the "place".. did the same usual things that i do everyday when i come down to my mum's office.. when home for lunch then.. dad went out.. followed mum.. hmm.. i had my migraine again.. sigh.. i'm bored bored bored.. =) late in the evening, whilst i was sitting there.. watching blades of glory.. i got bummed.. for what? for whatsoever no reason again.. i got sooooo annoyed after a while..
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dad: why keep watching movie? watching people acting only? is it worth ur time? why don't u use that time to read the bible? how many times have u read the bible? u can spend hours in front of the tv, playing games in front of the comp, playing ur piano, smsing, but u don't have time to read the bible? even pastor tie's daughter, ur age already read the bible 11 times.. how many times have u read the bible? u only spend ur time-
me: u don't see me reading the bible doesn't mean that i don't read the bible
dad: how many times have u read it?
me: it doesn't matter how many times i've read it i don't have to report it to u.
dad: i'm not trying to show off that i've finish reading 6 times already.. even the RC brother Dennis says we should READ the bible and how many times have u read it?
me: *roll eyes*
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see?? that's how messed up things can get.. honestly, i don't get the point.. fine! read the bible.. as many times as u can.. but how do u live your life in christianity? sure u say u believe in Jesus, u believe there's God, u believe that there's a second coming of Jesus, u believe in resurrection, u believe, u have faith, but if u live ur life pointing our other people's mistake and picking on other people's life what's the point? the bible tells ur NEVER judge others.. what right does he have to judge my mum, my sis, n me? okay! GREAT~ he reads the bible! he's a good christian! that's what he wants to hear.. he gets all PROUD and snobbish whenever someone praises him or recognises him as a christian.. every human being will make mistake.. and we learn from it ourself.. nobody and i mean NOBODY has the right to pick on your life, tell u what to do, judge u for the kind of Christian u are, am i right? *sigh, buries face in hands* here's more..
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dad: i don't have the right to change u and u have to change urself.. use ur time to read the words of God.. honestly speaking u are REALLY lazy! u see uncle peter's(neighbour) daughter, no mother, n she wakes up early every morning n bring the laundry out without having being asked to.. what u doing at that time? sleeping in bed! u're really very fortunate n lazy!
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*momentary silence*
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me: *turns off tv, grabs book, bottle, goes into the room, locks self up*
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yeah.. that's what i do.. i respect my parents.. i don't NEVER argue back.. i don't raise my voice.. what do i do? i just take in all the blame.. go into my room.. lock myself up.. i spent the rest of the night lying on the floor in the room with silent tears.. sigh..
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honestly, NO. i'm not like what my dad says.. i do the work around the house too.. i do the laundry.. i fold the clothes.. i vacuum n mop the house WITHOUT being asked to.. i wash the dishes.. i clean up the kitchen.. i wash the car.. what else does he want me to do!?!?! everything that we do in the house is WRONG! just this morning, my mum wanted to take the garbage out.. she came out empty handed i didn't say anything..
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mum: it's like seeing a ghost when u enter the house.. ppl want take the rubbish out he scold..[this according to my mum]
dad: no need throw! i'll take a big plastic bag and put all in later to throw!
mum: how i know what r u going to do!? people don't throw u scold! people wanna throw u also scold! and u don't have to use that tone! can't u speak nicely to people!
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sigh.. that's my dad.. in the car..
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mum: really very RUDE that man! what's the difference that he retires early or not! he's still the same! always very RUDE!! even with my parents! he has no respect for my parents! never even call them! so RUDE!! once rude forever RUDE!!
me: *silence*
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yeah.. i'm listening.. i'm a listener.. sigh.. i'm so tired of life at home.. getting away from all this, i'm happy.. yet sad.. why? not only because of my friends.. but i have my worries too.. for my parents.. how will my mum put up with my dad then.. with his attitude now, i'd rather stay in kuching.. sigh.. *buries face in hands n sobs* he's bugging me to clear out my piano books now..
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dad: what are those books under the table there!?? i've seen them there for a long time already! what are those books??
mum: haiya! those are her piano books! she don't know where to put them! she can't keep them in the shelf where is she supposed to put them??
dad: i told her already! those that she don't play anymore the elementary ones can throw away already!
mum: some has songs in there which she wants to play why do u keep forcing people to throw!?
dad: she don't play those elementary ones anymore keep for what?!? can throw already! taking up space! sooner or later have to throw also in the end! when she goes perth i've to take care of them n clean them again! make me busy only!
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=( just because.. JUST BECAUSE I'M NOT TAKING UP MUSIC COURSE ANYMORE DOESN'T MEAN MUSIC ISN'T MY INTEREST ANYMORE OKAY?!?! I LOVE MUSIC!! I WANT TO BE A GOOD MUSICIAN!! I WANT TO MAKE MUSIC MY CAREER!! BUT DO I HAVE A CHOICE!?! CAN I PLAY!?!? WITH AN INJURED WRIST THAT HURTS WHEN I PLAY TOO MUCH?!? DO I HAVE A CHOICE BUT TO PUSH ASIDE THAT DREAM!?!?
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i don't want to blog anymore.. bye`
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